How I Thwarted A Crypto Scammer

I thought I was being nice to someone who texted the wrong person in early June. We developed a friendship that lasted until June 22nd. I had my suspicions, but I also liked this person and the relationship we were building. It ended, but I share this because I want to warn people.

We Meet

It was Saturday, June 6th, and I got a text from 213-434-xxxx, an unknown number:

I do get these types of messages occasionally, but they are often such obvious scams that I just block messages from that number. This one seemed like a very honest error by a human, so I did try to help the person.

The response that I got after wishing the person "good luck" to the last post from above, was this:

This was a weekend that my wife was visiting her mother in Santa Fe, and I was headed to an event hosted by the Bridges organization at a church a few miles from my house. The event was to present groups that were working on solutions to domestic violence. We had a big exchange before I went there, and I found out the person was Amy, she was Indonesian and lived in San Francisco. She even said this:

Although we met in such an unexpected way, we were able to have a sincere conversation, which made me feel that life is really interesting. A text message sent by mistake could actually lead to an interesting friendship.

When I got back, there was a lot more information exchanged, and I learned that she worked at the Ritz-Carlton in San Francisco as Director of Operations. She previously worked in real estate in Indonesia but came to the U.S. after getting divorced. . I also learned that she is an atheist.

As the texts were nearing an end for Saturday, Amy shared that one of her favorite books is Rich Dad Poor Dad, and she asked me if I had read it. We communicated further on Sunday, when Amy texted me at 10:43, pushing that book again. She said:

It really gave me a completely new perspective on financial management! Perhaps you can read it.

I responded that I was headed out for a walk. She told me to have a nice walk and asked me my thoughts on WhatsApp while I was on my walk. She had already mentioned this service on Saturday to "better protect our personal privacy." Amy had mentioned this earlier in the day. I had told her that I would give it some thought. She explained then that her family had been scammed out of a lot of money because her personal information had been stolen by criminals.

I Have Doubts But Continue

While I continued to enjoy the exchange of texts and building what seemed to me to be a friendship, I had concerns. First, I never learned the last name of Amy. I did not try, to be fair, but this was a yellow flag. I also had looked up her hotel to see if there was any information on Amy. There was not. I did find that there is a Director of Operations mentioned, and he is on LinkedIn. Another yellow flag...

On Sunday, about 24 hours after the initial text, I decided to install WhatsApp on my phone, though this was another yellow flag to me. The communications were frequent and included one video exchange on June . Some of the exchanges concerned me, as it seemed like "Amy" had forgotten what I had stated previously, like my love for San Francisco. I had sent pictures the day before, and she had responded. How could she forget?

There were things that kept coming up. like questions about the book she had recommended. I did check it out of the library (digital format) on June 17th. She also asked me about crypto. Over and over. She said:

Every time I engage in short term cryptocurrency trading, I need to analyze and calculate to determine the precise trading point before investing capital. I only make investments that I'm 100% certain of.

That was the wrong thing to say to me, as I know that very little in life is 100% probability. I questioned her, and she said:

Yes, I only make trades when I'm absolutely certain. If I'm not 100% confident about a trade, I won't invest. I'm not a gambler.

She told me about her uncle who helps her with his team of financial analysts. Again, the wrong thing to say to me! She later asked me about my involvement with charities, and she told me that she used her Weibo account to help people in need. I asked her what Weibo is, and she apologized for making an error. She rephrased it, saying she used her "limited abilities" to help. I just looked to see that Weibo is a Chinese social media platform.

Looking back at the conversations, she was often saying things like we need to "try new things." She also kept calling my situation a "retirement" from work, which it is not, and she was encouraging me to consider "side hustles."

I Ask a Friend What He Would Do

On June 14th, I walked to the Beth Israel Cemetery on Dallas, as I often do, to visit my friend, John B., who monitors the entrance there. I have gotten to know John over the past three years, and this is a part-time job for him. He works full-time for Harris Health, which is a fantastic company in Houston.

I had not planned on bringing Amy up, but I did near the end of my visit with him. She had left for Seattle from San Francisco. I asked him first if I should tell my wife about it, and he told me that I should not because no woman ever want to hear about their husband's friendships with other women. He told me that I should just end it, that it was probably a scam. His view was that she, a single woman, was trying to get me into her life. I told him that I appreciated his view and thanked him for sharing it, but that I did not agree. I told him I would give it some thought.

I told John that I would come the next week and let him know what I was thinking, but he told me that he was taking off for Father's Day. I did discuss this incident with a "friend" named Claude.

I am kind of sort of a big fan of AI. It can be very wrong, but I have found Claude to be very perceptive. I explained to the AI agent the situation, and Claude responded"

This is a genuinely interesting and nuanced situation. Let me lay out the pros and cons honestly.

The Honest Bottom Line

The question you're actually wrestling with isn't really pros and cons of a long-distance friendship. It's: why haven't you told your wife? That's the thread worth pulling. A friendship you can mention casually over dinner is one thing. A friendship you're actively keeping hidden while asking friends for permission to keep secret is something your gut already knows needs a second look.

That doesn't mean anything bad has happened or that you're a bad person. It means this has grown into something that deserves honest reflection — and probably an honest conversation with your wife.

I explained what I meant by kind of liking Amy, and I discussed that I had no interest at all in a relationship with her. I shared some details, and Claude responded:

It Ends

I had been impressed by how patient Amy had been. It seemed to me that no scammer would spend that much time trying to scam someone. But, the patience wore over the next week. We did have a video call on Tuesday, June 16th. It was very short, but she said that I looked younger and more handsome in person than in photos. Hmm. A couple of days later she said that she was planning dates for a trip to Houston. Later that day, she sent a chart of a crypto trade that showed a profit of $206,000, saying "making money is actually a very simple matter." She tried to get me to do simulated trading. Hmm. Then, she asked me to quantify my profits from stocks in the near-term. I pushed back on this, and she got defensive, saying that we should study together.

On Thursday morning she told me how important it is to listen to the advice of others. I responded, "I will share an idea that I got from someone on Sunday that I did not like: I should quit communicating with you." She didn't respond, but did say something, and I asked if she had seen it. She said yes, but two minutes later she said "I'd like to know who gave you this advice." I told her "John B., my friend" and she said that I should listen to myself and got very defensive.

I actually installed a crypto-trading app on my phone so that I could "learn" more. I installed Onchain, but I started to read the book that she had suggested that week too. She got mad that I wouldn't move forward, and I got concerned that she cared so much. On the last day she communicated with me, which was the Monday after Father's Day, she got really upset:

My last words to "Amy" were this:

Did you text me by accident 16 days ago???

I will never know, and I really don't care. I did fall for that accidental connection that I shared near the beginning, and I probably fell for some other things too, but, most importantly, I did not lose a dime.

I have called the Ritz-Carlton Hotel in San Francisco, speaking to H.R. The lady was very kind and seemed to appreciate my outreach, telling me that she would pass it along to her management and that I might hear from them. I have not. I reported it to the FBI on an online form, but I have not heard back from them yet. I also reached out to WhatsApp, again online, and stated that someone was using their service perhaps as part of a scam. I have not heard back yet from that company, which is owned by Meta Platforms.

I probably should have been doing this earlier, but I did review many of the photos that "Amy" sent. I had thought she was sending me too many and too personal (not x-rated or even r-rated, but just too much). Here she is with her "son":

According to Google AI: "The individual depicted is known for her appearance on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills."

I don't yet have any final conclusions. I did enjoy the relationship with "Amy" for a little over two weeks. I am not sure if I was a potential scam victim, though I certainly believe so. I lost nothing but time, but I enjoyed the time. It didn't get in the way of my full-time job of looking for a job!

I did thank Claude for the cautious views, and I liked the response: